I Treat Men Every Day. This is Why They’re Afraid to Ask for Help.
Men are four times more likely to die by suicide than women, and yet it’s hard for medical experts to find them
May is the month of family barbecues and holiday weekends. It’s also Mental Health Awareness Month — because it happens to be the month with the highest suicide rates in the United States. As a family physician, a large part of my job is recognizing depression and preventing the consequences of unchecked mental health in my patients. Sifting through the emotional turmoil of depression and identifying people who will actually pursue suicide is a challenge, but there is one patient population that has consistently demonstrated an increased risk for suicide: men.
Men are four times more likely than women to die of suicide, but are less likely to be diagnosed with internalizing disorders such as depression. The devastating effects of depression in men have been well documented in scientific literature, but it wasn’t until late 2018 that the American Psychological Association released new guidelines that articulated how masculinity affects mental health — along with recommendations on how to tailor treatment to the specific needs of men.
The term “toxic masculinity” has arisen in mainstream media as of late, but there’s some confusion on its meaning. Toxic masculinity as a scientific, medical term is meant to represent masculine traits that have been found harmful to the health of men specifically. However, the term has taken on a different meaning in popular culture, often referring to a specific set of negative characteristics associated with “locker room behavior” that induce acts of violence, aggression, and sexism. Masculinity, toxic or not, seems to have a different meaning for everyone, and it is largely shaped by the men we encounter in our lives.
When I think of what it means to be a man, the first person who comes to my mind is my father. He came from humble beginnings and lost his own father at the age of 12. He quickly had to become self-reliant, taking on odd jobs to help support his family. He grew to become a muscular, 6-foot-2 gentle giant, but his work ethic was his defining characteristic and earned him the respect of the men around him.
