Member-only story
Long-Haul Covid Is an Awful Mystery
Here’s what living with it feels like
You know the doctor’s appointment isn’t starting well when the nurse looks at the blood pressure cuff and frowns. “Did I put it too tight,” she asks, “Is your circulation all right?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” I reply absently. “I haven’t been able to feel that arm in a couple of days.” I show her the lump in my elbow and explain there’s one in my neck and one in my back. They’re everywhere, as a matter of fact. And those lumps mean one thing to me: no feeling, or if I’m lucky, pins and needles.
She takes my blood pressure and frowns again, then hurries out and approaches soon after with the doctor. At least it’s my regular physician. Seeing a new doctor means justifying my illness over and over again.
The medical staff make me lie down and rest and don’t seem satisfied until my heart rate gets below 115. I’m asked a couple of questions and I explain that my heart rate does that when I stand too long. I waited in line to check in, remember. The five minutes standing made me pale and sweaty. My heart rate rises and feels hard in my chest.
I need a cardiologist apparently. And a neurologist. These are to be added to the pulmonologist and gastroenterologist I still see regularly.
Welcome to the reality of long-haul covid. A lot of people wonder what it’s like, or think that Covid is one and done. It’s not. It can change your life.
Bad days happen regularly
Today is a bad day for me. I can barely feel the toes in one of my feet. Fingers are tingling on both hands and one palm is numb. My head is like Seattle — full of fog and half-glimpsed thought. There are spots on my limbs that are painful and that’s where the numbness begins. The doctor thinks this is where the swollen lymph nodes are pressing on my nerves.
I haven’t written much this week — I blame long-haul Covid. I’m having trouble trying to think.
Brain fog means no work
I work in IT… or I used to. But as the senior technologist and manager, I had too much authority. If I typed the wrong line, I could literally destroy a company by dropping a database or something…
