The Death of Libido

The pandemic is keeping us at home — but out of the bedroom

Kate Morgan
Elemental

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A stressed couple lying down on the bed and staring at the ceiling.
Photo: torwai/iStock/Getty Images Plus

During the pandemic, Lola Jean stopped having sex.

That fact alone is not unusual. But given that Jean, on top of being a New York City-based sex educator and mental health professional, also works as a professional domme and had just started a new relationship, it suggests declining libido might be part of a larger trend.

“In general, I would describe myself as a very sexual person with a high sex drive,” she says. “During quarantine, I entered my first relationship, so we’re still in the honeymoon phase and theoretically should be having sex all the time.”

“You can’t be stressed and have great sex. You need to feel at ease, and safe. There are a lot of obvious reasons why people can’t relax right now.”

And yet, Jean says she and her partner were in something of a sex slump; an experience that’s being shared by many as the closures and stay-at-home orders triggered by Covid-19 enter a sixth month. And — like most modern problems — it’s all the pandemic’s fault.

Stress kills the mood

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Kate Morgan
Elemental

Kate is a freelance journalist who’s been published by Popular Science, The New York Times, USA Today, and many more. Read more at bykatemorgan.com.