We’ve Been Pooping Wrong All Along

‘I think the United States is ass-backwards, always.’

Allie Volpe
Elemental

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A top down view of a modern bidet fixture between emerald bathroom tiles.
Photo: welcomia/iStock/Getty Images Plus

AAmong the unforeseen effects of the coronavirus pandemic, bidet sales in the U.S. have skyrocketed as people face toilet paper shortages across the nation.

But even prior to the pandemic, alternative toilets were entering the conversation in the name of wellness. Inspired by our ancestors and international neighbors, “innovations” like the Squatty Potty and bidet toilet attachments alter and supposedly optimize the way we poop.

“I think the United States is ass-backwards, always,” says Dr. Evan Goldstein, a proctologist and anal surgeon at his own New York and Los Angeles practice, Bespoke Surgical. “When you look at Europe, you look at the trends of bidets and appropriate hygiene from an anal perspective, the U.S. has always lagged behind.”

“I think the United States is ass-backwards, always.”

In colonial America, going to the bathroom was a seated affair. Privy pits — circular brick-lined wells — and outhouses with round holes cut from wood planks serving as a seat were precursors to the modern toilet. Elsewhere in the world, like China, squat toilets were commonplace, requiring a user to squat to floor level to reach the toilet opening. Just as popular…

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Allie Volpe
Elemental

Writes about lifestyle, trends, and pop psychology for The Atlantic, New York Times, Rolling Stone, Playboy, Washington Post, and more.